Rough sketch for the beginning of a song.
Feedback and criticism very much welcome!
(Listen w/ headphones)
If you could see where I have landed
The evenings glow like a Nolde sunset
And there's no need to find a face
And there's no need to find a face
When you meet the slow city
3 comments:
Really like the change of pace this piece has. The twirks and snooks and all. Lyrics are ok. Its where you're at. I had to look Nolde up on google and its really beautiful. Glad you have a term for what you're living, melancholic german expressionist :: )
(hah. maybe not melancholic. radiohead'y. contemporary)
Good post! Happy to listen
I like it a lot, a great rough sketch. I agree with PeePee, good twirks and snooks. Could add a breakdown sort of interlude in the middle with lots more clicks (though the even spacing of every 8 measures (?) works really well for the body of the song), maybe add that single slightly creepy/off note in the beginning that quickly turns into a harmonic chord (I'm using a language i don't speak here, i hope it make sense).
i like the lyrics a lot but think that lines 1-3 could keep the same harmony-- then when the electric fuzz-wave buzzes in comfortably you hear a change in harmony and the title of the song, also the strongest lyric in my opinion, washes into your ears.
Very excited to see where you take this
Thanks PeePee and Alex! Really appreciate you guys listening and giving such good feedback! Alex, I like your idea of a "breakdown" in the middle of the song where all the quirky bits come to the front and the off-sounding harmonies come back, that'd be a nice contrast from the balanced verse-section. I'm also glad you like the lyrics. That's always something I'm unsure about. I think PeePee would say there needs to be more of a story and that's a good point -- as the song progress I'll try to have the lyrics unfold "something."
By the way, definitely tell me if there are things you immediately dislike upon hearing these "sketches," because that's really insightful for me, too.
Thanks again! :)
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